all my crying

;_____________; I-I wanna cry… LOL.

I’m really asdklfjslifjilwe Q A Q … SOMETIMES I REALLY CANNOT DEAL WITH MY OWN IDIOCY. And this sounds really cocky, but I’m supposed to be a model student. ;w; I always do all my work, always take notes, always pay attention, always do my best. I’ve never been late before and I never disturb class. AND AGHHHHH I really feel stupid for letting this kind of thing happen to me. I’m never irresponsible like this. :/

I feel terrible for disturbing class like that D’x It was really, really, really awkward walking in the second time… I’m glad I have 0 friends in the class so nobody asked me what happened!! OwOb

But I’m really bad at handling embarrassing mistakes/incidents in front of people.. >< These kinds of things plague me for a really long time and ruin my day. I know I’m overthinking it, but I feel really idiotic. I also hate attention; I’m the kid that sits in the corner and has trouble interacting with others. All in all, I’m really disappointed in myself. I’m mentally kicking myself.

A-although I guess that’s better than nobody caring. Q A Q A lot better. I’m always terrified whenever I post anything on fb that nobody’ll reply and I’ll look like a loser LOL. -has often deleted after posting things- That’s why I have a hard time posting statuses there, but x: just this once, I was really depressed enough to haha.

x_X I kind of almost wanted to complain on twitter too but I don’t think I’m yet comfortable with ranting there OTL…
Twitter has been kind of fun lately though. OwO I’m really happy that lately I’ve been making more online friends~ Q A Q I’m happy they don’t mind talking to me. And I really like when people interact with me on twitter and facebook ‘CAUSE IT’S LIKE ;____; they don’t mind talking to me in public! They’re not embarrassed of knowing me and are okay with showing off our friendship in public. ;w; Idk, I’m weird. I feel like it’s a huge honor for anybody to even talk to me. Or even just so much as to not find me annoying. ;A;
/forever socially challenged freak

Anyway, I was incredibly downtrodden this morning–to the point where I had trouble even putting my head up because I felt like I couldn’t face the class or the teacher–but I’m doing okay now. ^^ I know it’s not a big deal and I’m the only one blowing it out of proportions so I’ll try to not let it affect me so much.
ON A POSITIVE NOTE, I got an A on my in-class essay AND I got 100% on that assignment from last week that caused me to stay up til 6:20 AM, only getting an hour and 20 minutes of sleep before school. 8DDDDDDD Apparently a lot of people did really poorly on those two things HAHAHA -shot for enjoying others’ failure-


A-and now I have to spend the next few days doing nothing but mixing. ;______; [Or, well, actually I have a lot of quizzes and projects due Wednesday and next week…] -sobs- It’s a gift for a friend though. >A< And it’s.. already very late and I feel bad about it but akdsfliwj okay I just have to do my best!

Alright, on an attempt to end this post on a lighter note,
here’s a selca of my fail tears!


One Response

  1. don’t worry – we all have those days. cheer up, things will get better. eva, himnae!~

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